Daily Bike Forecast — by Bike Snob NYC

October 24th, 2018: Fire Trucks and Fire Sales

Could be gusty today so equip yourself accordingly:

Wednesday Weather

Wednesday Mostly sunny, with a high near 54. Northwest wind 14 to 16 mph, with gusts as high as 28 mph.

Wednesday Night Mostly clear, with a low around 41. Northwest wind 10 to 15 m

Sunrise: 7:17am

Sunset: 6:03pm

Staten Island is getting some new bike connections:

The DOT has provided photographic evidence that the Amtrak Bridge on the Hudson River Greenway is being repaired:

And the evolution of Delancey Street remains the subject of much speculation:

If you use Citi Bike check the status of your favorite station because here's another one down:

And we all know what's really delaying those emergency response times:

Oh, and PLEASE STOP GIVING THIS GUY MATERIAL ALREADY:

I'm not sure any of that was more obtrusive than his honking, but still.

Finally, Mayor de Blasio has made much of closing the greenway gaps in Manhattan, but won't somebody think of those pour souls on Sutton Place?

The neighbors say that the bridge — which would span the FDR Drive at East 54th Street and link a new riverside esplanade to Sutton Place South — would “destroy” Clara Coffey Park, a tiny, leafy oasis at the easternmost end of 54th Street overlooking the East River.

Hey, nobody likes seeing parks destroyed, but bear in mind that in NIMBY-speak "destroy" usually means "other people will be able to get to it."

They also fear that it would bring legions of cyclists into their midst, endanger the neighborhood’s elderly residents and diminish property values.

It's true, property values have plummeted and seniors have been picked off one by one wherever bike lanes have been installed.

In fact, according to Cuozzo, de Blasio may be installing the bridge as part of an elaborate scheme to kill Andrew Cuomo's mom:

In the oddest twist, some residents of fancy apartment buildings at 25, 45 and 50 Sutton Place South even say that the location of the bridge is a stroke by Mayor Bill de Blasio to spite his political nemesis, Gov. Andrew Cuomo.

One building near the foot of the planned bridge is home to the gov’s mother, Matilda Cuomo — and sale values in the building have supposedly plummeted there since the bridge plan was announced.

A rep for the governor’s office didn’t respond to our questions.

This sounds rather insidious, but bear in mind that "some residents" is Cuozzo-speak for "thing Steve Cuozzo just made up."

However, there is a silver lining in all of this, because in trying to kill Cuomo's mom de Blasio is actually creating some much-needed affordable housing.  Yes, according to Ron Spurga, who we can only assume is Cuozzo's drinking buddy, you can now snap up Sutton Place co-ops for a song:

Bridge foe Ron Spurga lives in a co-op at 45 Sutton Place South, which stands at the foot of the planned bridge. As a result, he said, “Some units are on the market at discounted prices.”

In fact, I'm pleased to announce my offer for 45 Sutton Place South Apartment 8F has been accepted:

Sutton Place South

Sure, the $4,895,000 asking price was a bit steep, but when I told the sellers I knew that legions of killer cyclists would soon be descending on the neighborhood they let me have it for fifteen hundred bucks cash.

Now I just have to pass the board.  If you need me I'll be in front of the mirror practicing my 20-minute monologue about how I hate cyclists.